Ken Griffey Junior. About a week ago I was at a bar and I saw a program on FSN called “The Top 50 Collisions in Baseball History,” really an enjoyable program aside from one glaring, disgusting error. One of their greatest collisions was Ken Griffey Junior making Willie Mays look like Scotty Smalls catching a ball against the centerfield wall at the King Dome and breaking his wrist. I hadn’t yet had my first beer, but I went to the bathroom and vomited. I remember watching that live. That was the day that the best baseball player that ever lived shat upon his legacy.
This blog died for a bit (along with my laptop) but I’m going to attempt to bring it back from the dead, much like my favorite movie genre (Zombie flicks). For those who don’t know I had a laptop die on me and when I got it back I neglected to continue writing, but through some very influential requests I’m going to re-begin KillWhiteyHerzog at the All-Star break. The first posts will be about how horribly misguided all my efforts were to pick the winners of various awards, and some seriously pumped writing about a Cubs fan enjoying the Pirates making the others from the NL Central shake in their boots. I apologize about the break, especially during a critical time , but the second half this blog will bring very minimal insights and hopefully some humor to anyone ridiculous enough to waste time reading. Thank you and Best,
I grew up a Cubs fan and that is how I have always seen myself but I am not one of those fans who loves his team and hates everyone else. The Cubs will always be my team but I also root for players who, I feel, play the game “the right way.” The players I root for are the ones who are diving for balls when they are down by six. The ones who jump into the stands chasing pop ups (but not this way….like this). The guys who always run out ground balls. This are the guys I want on my team, not the kind of player who only seems to play well if they are in a contract year (Yeah I’m look at you Adrian Beltre).
Josh Hamilton sucks. Not in the baseball sense mind you. He is the reigning MVP and he deserved to win the award. He’s a great player he sucks as a person. Hamilton wants you to believe he is a great guy, a great husband, a great teammate but I’m not buying it. Maybe he is a nice guy. I don’t know because I have never met him. Is he the best husband? Well obviously not. But hey, he is a professional athlete and there is a lot of temptation out there. What I do know is that he is a shitty teammate.
The first thing you will notice when you look at the National League rosters compared to the American League rosters is how young the NL players are. Weird, right? Because I thought every good baseball player was pushing 35 but maybe thats because the only games that ever get shown on TV are Yankees/Red Sox games. Its crazy to think that some teams out there are currently developing talent instead of just auctioning the same old players. How did that work out Tampa? Here are just a few, of the loooong list, of solid young players that we think are poised for a break out this year.
Every year in every sport people rise above the cream of the crop and become the new favorites in a sport, and others show their true colors and become the newest Milton Bradley in their respective league. Now it takes quite a bit to reach Milton’s level, but there are some guys on the Junior circuit who may be big enough closet assholes to come out and win this award. Now for me to pick this I’m probably going to pick someone I just effing hate, see Ozzie Guillen, but to truly win it you have to be hated for good reason, and generally hold your team’s head under water as though you’re baptizing them.
Here’s a riddle, how do you take the best thing ever, and make it the worst? Add the Yankees and the Red Sox. Is there anything more overplayed than this horribly overrated rivalry? This rivalry is as overrated as having babies. Did you know that you don’t get to copulate any further once that happens, and after you have to raise a little asshole version of you? It’s the second worst, behind Red Sox-Yankees. Every year baseball is infested by morons from outside the sport talking about how great these 7 hour slap fights are. How can so many people think this is a great rivalry?